So I am currently in a "funk" if you'd like to call it that.
I don't know whats going on with me.
I just seem to not be myself.
I've narrowed it down to a few different idea's on WHY?
But I still don't feel like myself when I change them.
Love.
I don't see why I consider this reason to my funk.
I Have an amazing Family.
That Loves me.
I have a bunch of Friends, who I never see.
But always talk to. We always end our conversations with;
I love you.
But Yet...
I Have no Relationship going on with anyone..
None of my REAL friends live near me....
Only The Backstabbers and liars do....
My Hearts been broken to many times.....
School
I Think I've just taken so much on my plate with things.
I have so much going for me.
Yet...
I feel swamped at very turn...
My Art teacher even realizes Im not myself....
Friends/Family.
I Have this girl who is just like my sister.
She is why Im still here today.
My Parents are Amazing.
People say they are always there for me.
Yet...
When I ask for there help or there opinions I get nothing...
My bestfriend lives miles away in Texas....
I feel like I can never do enough.
Over the past few weeks I've realized who I need the most in my life.
Someone I thought once ment the world to me, well now that person can be equivalent to dirt.
I Think I need a break from this town...
This Life....
These People.
I hope I get out fo this "Funk".
I've been told just sit back.
Enjoy the ride, and take in the veiw.
But I can't I need to know whats going on with my life.
Wishing
Hoping
Hurting
Healing
Feeling
Breathing
Seeing
Being.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
The Final Hoo-Ra
The “Last” Creative Writing Story. : [
I grasped her hand as we walked up the subway stations stairs. The noises coming from all around us, seeming to engulfing the atmosphere around us. A man screaming, a fire truck’s siren going off from the next street over, as well as the police cars siren squealing where we belonged. New York City.
“J. Can you believe it? We made it, into the town of our dreams. The great white way.!” Brandy exclaimed as we made our way down forty-second street, and into the heart of times square. She could hardly contain her excitement, if my hand wasn’t attached to her, she would most likely be jumping up and down.
“It’s not like we haven’t been here before, Brandy. We are only here for you to see the theater for Midnight Madness. It’s not like we one here for good.” I said dragging her along the street.
“Don’t crush my hopes and dream J.” she said playfully.
“I’m not, I’m just letting you know that we are here to see the theater. You won’t officially be here for another year, maybe even too.” I continued as we walked along.
Smiling we walked along the street. Looking as if we were a couple instead of two best friends.
“So Last time we were here together we saw Spring Awakening. It was amazing, remember?” I asked Brandy as we turned onto, forty-ninth street.
“Ya.Ya. LOOK! It’s the theater.” Brandy said as she began running to the middle of the street. Grabbing my hand I almost lost balance as we headed down the street. “We’re here. The future home of Midnight Madness!” she shouted jumping up and down. People began to look at us as if Brandy had lost her mind.
“I don’t know you” I said sarcastically, as I turned a way from you.
“Oh, Shut it.” She said as she grabbed my hand. “We made it!”
“You made it.” I said correcting her.
I grasped her hand as we walked up the subway stations stairs. The noises coming from all around us, seeming to engulfing the atmosphere around us. A man screaming, a fire truck’s siren going off from the next street over, as well as the police cars siren squealing where we belonged. New York City.
“J. Can you believe it? We made it, into the town of our dreams. The great white way.!” Brandy exclaimed as we made our way down forty-second street, and into the heart of times square. She could hardly contain her excitement, if my hand wasn’t attached to her, she would most likely be jumping up and down.
“It’s not like we haven’t been here before, Brandy. We are only here for you to see the theater for Midnight Madness. It’s not like we one here for good.” I said dragging her along the street.
“Don’t crush my hopes and dream J.” she said playfully.
“I’m not, I’m just letting you know that we are here to see the theater. You won’t officially be here for another year, maybe even too.” I continued as we walked along.
Smiling we walked along the street. Looking as if we were a couple instead of two best friends.
“So Last time we were here together we saw Spring Awakening. It was amazing, remember?” I asked Brandy as we turned onto, forty-ninth street.
“Ya.Ya. LOOK! It’s the theater.” Brandy said as she began running to the middle of the street. Grabbing my hand I almost lost balance as we headed down the street. “We’re here. The future home of Midnight Madness!” she shouted jumping up and down. People began to look at us as if Brandy had lost her mind.
“I don’t know you” I said sarcastically, as I turned a way from you.
“Oh, Shut it.” She said as she grabbed my hand. “We made it!”
“You made it.” I said correcting her.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Defying Gravity
So After listening to the music and reading the lyrics of the popular song Defying Gravity from an Amazing Musical known as Wicked I felt like "explaining" it in my way.
The Wicked Point of Veiw
When the song is sung in the Musical by Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West. It is describing her feelings of being trapped and held back. She knows she could make a difference but, the Wizard and his assistant Madame Morrible have other plans to use her for. When Elphaba finds out that the Wizard and Morrible only want her to use her witchcraft to create "spies" for them and to get rid of the Animals in Oz, she snaps.Going with Galinda, now known as Glinda (Due to her recent name change when the Animal Dr. Dillamond is removed from Shiz Campus) to the highest tower in the Wizards Castle, Elphaba tries to tell Glinda that together they could fight the Wizard and restore Peace with the Animals, and stop them from becoming animals.In The end Glinda gives Elphaba a broom, which she uses a levitation enchantment on and leaves the Emerald city as a fugitive. An Enemy of Oz.
My Point of Veiw
To me this song is one that says nothings gonna bring you down. Nothing can stop you and hold you back. I'm through Excepting Limits Cause someone says there so. To me people in the everyday world are telling you you have to do this you have to do that, but sometimes you don't. Sometimes you also just have to take a leap and say things you never expect to say to anyone. No matter how things end up there will always be a bright side. Sooner or Later.
The Wicked Point of Veiw
When the song is sung in the Musical by Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West. It is describing her feelings of being trapped and held back. She knows she could make a difference but, the Wizard and his assistant Madame Morrible have other plans to use her for. When Elphaba finds out that the Wizard and Morrible only want her to use her witchcraft to create "spies" for them and to get rid of the Animals in Oz, she snaps.Going with Galinda, now known as Glinda (Due to her recent name change when the Animal Dr. Dillamond is removed from Shiz Campus) to the highest tower in the Wizards Castle, Elphaba tries to tell Glinda that together they could fight the Wizard and restore Peace with the Animals, and stop them from becoming animals.In The end Glinda gives Elphaba a broom, which she uses a levitation enchantment on and leaves the Emerald city as a fugitive. An Enemy of Oz.
My Point of Veiw
To me this song is one that says nothings gonna bring you down. Nothing can stop you and hold you back. I'm through Excepting Limits Cause someone says there so. To me people in the everyday world are telling you you have to do this you have to do that, but sometimes you don't. Sometimes you also just have to take a leap and say things you never expect to say to anyone. No matter how things end up there will always be a bright side. Sooner or Later.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
HEY CREATIVE WRITING CLASS!
It's JJ..
Obviously.
Well Im not in class for the next two days,
Because Im painting.
You should come Visit me and Larissa at the Corner Store.
Anyway.
Have Fun Blogging today in Class.
Obviously.
Well Im not in class for the next two days,
Because Im painting.
You should come Visit me and Larissa at the Corner Store.
Anyway.
Have Fun Blogging today in Class.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
No Time.
I have hardly anytime for anything.
Ever.
I have so much to do this week,
then follow into next week with.
I have to:
- Sketch out my Painting for down town tomorrow.
- I need to Write my Creative Writing Story.
- I need to Re-Write a Paper for Ms. Cantillo.
- I need to read like 5 more chapters of the Grapes of Wrath.
- Write a Lab report. Due friday.
Im gonna have like a MELT DOWN.
I wish, I could just stop time for Five Minutes.
I think tomorrow, I'm going to ask Fitz, if I can do something besides Art.
Due to the fact I have so much to do, and with Painting Down town,
Not the greatest amount of time to do it in.
On the "Brighter" Side.
I've kinda gotten over some people, I thought I liked.
Though some People are still obnoxcious.
It drives me crazy, on how idiotic and jerky people are.
How can people Backstab you so much?
Do They not have a conscience?
Do they not have feelings either?
I Guess not.
I think I need to sort out all this stuff.
Ever.
I have so much to do this week,
then follow into next week with.
I have to:
- Sketch out my Painting for down town tomorrow.
- I need to Write my Creative Writing Story.
- I need to Re-Write a Paper for Ms. Cantillo.
- I need to read like 5 more chapters of the Grapes of Wrath.
- Write a Lab report. Due friday.
Im gonna have like a MELT DOWN.
I wish, I could just stop time for Five Minutes.
I think tomorrow, I'm going to ask Fitz, if I can do something besides Art.
Due to the fact I have so much to do, and with Painting Down town,
Not the greatest amount of time to do it in.
On the "Brighter" Side.
I've kinda gotten over some people, I thought I liked.
Though some People are still obnoxcious.
It drives me crazy, on how idiotic and jerky people are.
How can people Backstab you so much?
Do They not have a conscience?
Do they not have feelings either?
I Guess not.
I think I need to sort out all this stuff.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
What Hurts The Most.
Nothing I've been doing lately,
Is either not good enough or good at all.
Somethings wrong with my life and everything in it.
People arent who they used to be.
Friends arent really friends.
Back stabbers and Jerks are behind every corner.
I don't wanna be here anymore.
I wanna go back to a world where no one knows me.
I don't wanna be in Jersey anymore.
I'm not saying I'd do anything drastic, I'm just tierd of life here.
Its not fun anymore.
Nothing here is how it should be.
I thought I would be having fun this year.
Having the time of my life with the people I love.
Apparently the people I love, don't even care about me.
They'd rather put on masks and be people there not.
To be jerks and idiots for lack of better words.
Maybe they never were friends?
Maybe they were just standing here, acting like they really supported me.
Lies.
I guess Im living in a fantasy here.
Its not how it should be.
I'm ready for the moment, when I can leave this pathetic excuse for a real adventure.
I know its far fetched but I want to go somwhere no one knows me.
Or my past
Or my history
Or even my name.
I wanna be the outcast, or the new kid.
The person, people wonder about.
The person that no one knows anything about.
Im tierd of this life.
Im ready for something new.
I Think My rants over.
But There will be more....
I'm sure.
Is either not good enough or good at all.
Somethings wrong with my life and everything in it.
People arent who they used to be.
Friends arent really friends.
Back stabbers and Jerks are behind every corner.
I don't wanna be here anymore.
I wanna go back to a world where no one knows me.
I don't wanna be in Jersey anymore.
I'm not saying I'd do anything drastic, I'm just tierd of life here.
Its not fun anymore.
Nothing here is how it should be.
I thought I would be having fun this year.
Having the time of my life with the people I love.
Apparently the people I love, don't even care about me.
They'd rather put on masks and be people there not.
To be jerks and idiots for lack of better words.
Maybe they never were friends?
Maybe they were just standing here, acting like they really supported me.
Lies.
I guess Im living in a fantasy here.
Its not how it should be.
I'm ready for the moment, when I can leave this pathetic excuse for a real adventure.
I know its far fetched but I want to go somwhere no one knows me.
Or my past
Or my history
Or even my name.
I wanna be the outcast, or the new kid.
The person, people wonder about.
The person that no one knows anything about.
Im tierd of this life.
Im ready for something new.
I Think My rants over.
But There will be more....
I'm sure.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Journal Time!
So I haven't actually written anything deep dark in my journal lately.
I've been writing what ever I can towards the story Im writing.
Its nothing fantastic its just a short "novel".
In my Journal I've been putting little parts of it and notes.
Like who certain characters are refrenced with, descriptions of the setting and some narration.
Its really basic and I think it will come out pretty good when I actually have time to sit down and write it, which is like NEVER!
My life is like so0o0o0o Hectic.
Im doing set designs for the cabaret.
The Playbill Design :]
My Halloween Painitng for Downtown.
A Lab Report, in Chem ( Lets not even start about chemisty)
And an Essay to write towards my Eagle in Boyscouts
Theres sooooo much going on.
But Im actually almost done with everything.
Everything except Chem....(Again- lets not talk about it,)
Oh and I think Im back in love,
Ya We won't go there either : /
I think I have a good Idea for Next Years Play too.
Its not very School Appropriate though : [
But The Music is AMAZING!
The Best Little Wh***house in Texas :]
Always,
JJ
-You can leave in Scilence, No Lyric for today-
I've been writing what ever I can towards the story Im writing.
Its nothing fantastic its just a short "novel".
In my Journal I've been putting little parts of it and notes.
Like who certain characters are refrenced with, descriptions of the setting and some narration.
Its really basic and I think it will come out pretty good when I actually have time to sit down and write it, which is like NEVER!
My life is like so0o0o0o Hectic.
Im doing set designs for the cabaret.
The Playbill Design :]
My Halloween Painitng for Downtown.
A Lab Report, in Chem ( Lets not even start about chemisty)
And an Essay to write towards my Eagle in Boyscouts
Theres sooooo much going on.
But Im actually almost done with everything.
Everything except Chem....(Again- lets not talk about it,)
Oh and I think Im back in love,
Ya We won't go there either : /
I think I have a good Idea for Next Years Play too.
Its not very School Appropriate though : [
But The Music is AMAZING!
The Best Little Wh***house in Texas :]
Always,
JJ
-You can leave in Scilence, No Lyric for today-
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